the road to suburbia is a smokey one. story 3 of 3.

via

(that yellow fire extinguisher is clearly not mine.)

growing up in the public school system my birthday always fell during fire prevention week. instead of a week of anticipation, invitations, and (of course) parades, ponies, and tiaras i was exposed to a week of films, presentations, and essays on burned buildings, charred memories, and the risks of almost anything bursting into the flames.   instead of worrying what i might get for my birthday, who was going to sleepover, and what i was going to wear - i worried about all the crowded outlets, locked windows, and unorderly magazine piles which could (easy and obviously) cause my life to go up in flames.

why don't we have ladders at every second story window? what is our escape plan? where will we meet when we get outside? how fast can i stop, drop, and roll? and for love of god, who is going to get the dog?!

uncool public education. and very ineffective. and i know this because when our stove randomly burst into flames (and why wouldn't it?), saying i "panicked" and/or "froze" would be putting it lightly.

"what do you we do?uh, i think we call 911! jason, you call! where are my shoes? my wallet? my cell phone?" i screamed.

"you call 911. i'm going to get help," jason calmly said as he moseyed out the door and down the stairs.

"help? help? we don't need help. what we need is a new apartment!" i thought as i STOOD IN OUR APARTMENT  calling 911.

yep, thats right. i stood in the apartment as it filled with black smoke, my eyes started to sting, and i couldn't breathe quite right. it wasn't until i was sticking my head out the window for a breath of fresh air that i realized that the only way out was practically blocked by flames and that this was not how i was taught to react in school. i grabbed my wallet, threw on some shoes, and ran out the door.

when the flames where extinguished (thanks to jason and the local hardware store's fire extinguisher, not the fire department.) and our apartment and everything we owned was covered in soot and smelled like burnt popcorn we decided it was time to leave the city and its bugs, rodents, and slow'ish reacting fire department behind us.

"jason, i want to new place to live by the time i get back," i said as  i left that night for a 10 day business trip  rolling my once red, now grey'ish (and smelly) suitcase behind me.

and because he is amazing. because he makes me so happy. and because he didn't like it anymore than i did, he found us a sweet little apartment in the suburbs of new york city.

*pinch